Here's an aerial view of Victoria Falls, a picture of the leopard from the video below and a lion that decided to take his lunch to go. Enjoy!
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Best Photos from my Trip
I need to begin this with a disclaimer ***I did not take any of these pictures***. However, I was sitting next to the person with the really expensive camera that did.
Here's an aerial view of Victoria Falls, a picture of the leopard from the video below and a lion that decided to take his lunch to go. Enjoy!
Here's an aerial view of Victoria Falls, a picture of the leopard from the video below and a lion that decided to take his lunch to go. Enjoy!
Africa Videos
I've finally had the opportunity to upload all of my pics and videos from my last trip and I'm pleased to share some of (what I consider) the coolest ones with you.
Here's a video of Victoria Falls in Zimbabwe. This is one of the Seven Natural Wonders of the World and the world's largest waterfall - it makes Niagara look like a dripping faucet:
This next one is from when I went shark diving in Gansbaai, South Africa while staying at Grootbos:
This one is not for the faint of heart - while on safari we came across a leopard that had caught a duiker. Here it brings the still-alive antelope up a tree. If you decide to watch you should turn your sound on.
The final one is just to give you an idea of how close you get to the animals. This was taken while on safari at Savanna Lodge in South Africa. Tell me you wouldn't shit your pants if you were the guy sitting in front (the tracker)
Here's a video of Victoria Falls in Zimbabwe. This is one of the Seven Natural Wonders of the World and the world's largest waterfall - it makes Niagara look like a dripping faucet:
This next one is from when I went shark diving in Gansbaai, South Africa while staying at Grootbos:
This one is not for the faint of heart - while on safari we came across a leopard that had caught a duiker. Here it brings the still-alive antelope up a tree. If you decide to watch you should turn your sound on.
The final one is just to give you an idea of how close you get to the animals. This was taken while on safari at Savanna Lodge in South Africa. Tell me you wouldn't shit your pants if you were the guy sitting in front (the tracker)
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Some Video Examples of Why I Love Africa(ns)...
... Because this guy either just woke up or just got off the shitter and proceeded to throw down a tribal war dance for the amusement of some white tourists:
... Because the nursery school kids throw their hands in the air like they're at a Jay-Z concert while singing Old McDonald Had a Farm :
The who, what, where and why of this last video aren't quite as obvious, but if you look closely you'll realize the following,
Who: some absurd South African gentleman
What: smoking a cigar
Where: in the security line at Johannesburg International Airport
Why: who the fuck knows (or cares), but it's phenomenal
... Because the nursery school kids throw their hands in the air like they're at a Jay-Z concert while singing Old McDonald Had a Farm :
Who: some absurd South African gentleman
What: smoking a cigar
Where: in the security line at Johannesburg International Airport
Why: who the fuck knows (or cares), but it's phenomenal
Sunday, March 27, 2011
Hong Kong
I spent the last five days of my trip in Hong Kong for a rugby tournament. 24 nations participate and it's the biggest shitshow of an event that I've ever experienced. It's like Mardi Gras meets Super Bowl.
I remember very little from this portion of the trip, and to that point comes the only story that I do remember and feel comfortable sharing:
At the rugby matches, in an effort to raise money for charity, they sell space on the scoreboard to post any message you want. As you can imagine, later in the day (after many beers have been consumed) these can get quite funny.
Saturday was by far the longest/craziest day, we drank from about noon straight through to 2:30am. The majority of the first couple of hours at the stadium on Sunday was spent by our group piecing together Saturday's shenanigans. So, on Sunday afternoon the following message appeared:
If you have any idea what I did last
night please stop by the Cathay Pacific
suite and fill me in.
Thanks,
Dave
The reaction in our suite was great. People were dying with laughter. My only regret is that I didn't have a better camera to get a picture to post here.
Here is a picture that I just came across. Please don't ask me where I am, who these people are, or what trophy this is:
Here is a quick video just to attempt to show you the atmosphere in Hong Kong during the Rugby Sevens. The streets are like this from Thursday - Sunday for blocks and blocks:
I remember very little from this portion of the trip, and to that point comes the only story that I do remember and feel comfortable sharing:
At the rugby matches, in an effort to raise money for charity, they sell space on the scoreboard to post any message you want. As you can imagine, later in the day (after many beers have been consumed) these can get quite funny.
Saturday was by far the longest/craziest day, we drank from about noon straight through to 2:30am. The majority of the first couple of hours at the stadium on Sunday was spent by our group piecing together Saturday's shenanigans. So, on Sunday afternoon the following message appeared:
If you have any idea what I did last
night please stop by the Cathay Pacific
suite and fill me in.
Thanks,
Dave
The reaction in our suite was great. People were dying with laughter. My only regret is that I didn't have a better camera to get a picture to post here.
Here is a picture that I just came across. Please don't ask me where I am, who these people are, or what trophy this is:
Here is a quick video just to attempt to show you the atmosphere in Hong Kong during the Rugby Sevens. The streets are like this from Thursday - Sunday for blocks and blocks:
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
Why I Love Africa(ns)
I had dinner at the hotel bar tonight. To my right sat a 40-something woman from Australia that had just arrived Johannesburg to begin a 22 night vacation/safari; to my left was a 40-something Malawian man that asked the price of different drinks before ordering his inexpensive local beer.
There was a small catered event going on at the back of the bar - about 12 people with food and drinks. As that was winding down one of the women from the event approached us and told us to help ourselves as they were leaving and there was plenty of food left. The Australian woman - who could have easily purchased everything on the menu without thinking twice - immediately filled a plate of cold finger foods. While she was up I inquired as to why this obviously cash-strapped gentleman didn't help himself to the buffet table. I will never forget his answer:
"In my culture we offer whatever we have to anyone that is present. The fact that they have only offered us their scraps means that they think of me as nothing more than a dog. I would rather starve than be treated as a dog."
I guarantee that if you visited this man's home in his village in Malawi and all he had was one slice of bread you would be leaving his home with that bread in your stomach. It's unfortunate that the rest of the world does not operate in such a manner.
One of the people on a portion of this trip with me said it best, "the African villagers not only accept their situation, but make the most of it; while Americans only want more, no matter how much they already have".
I think I just broke my promise to never get deep on this blog again, but I just found that story too important not to share.
I'm off to Hong Kong tomorrow for the party of the year so I'm sure I'll either have some ridiculous or incoherent posts in the coming days - either way it should be hysterical!
There was a small catered event going on at the back of the bar - about 12 people with food and drinks. As that was winding down one of the women from the event approached us and told us to help ourselves as they were leaving and there was plenty of food left. The Australian woman - who could have easily purchased everything on the menu without thinking twice - immediately filled a plate of cold finger foods. While she was up I inquired as to why this obviously cash-strapped gentleman didn't help himself to the buffet table. I will never forget his answer:
"In my culture we offer whatever we have to anyone that is present. The fact that they have only offered us their scraps means that they think of me as nothing more than a dog. I would rather starve than be treated as a dog."
I guarantee that if you visited this man's home in his village in Malawi and all he had was one slice of bread you would be leaving his home with that bread in your stomach. It's unfortunate that the rest of the world does not operate in such a manner.
One of the people on a portion of this trip with me said it best, "the African villagers not only accept their situation, but make the most of it; while Americans only want more, no matter how much they already have".
I think I just broke my promise to never get deep on this blog again, but I just found that story too important not to share.
I'm off to Hong Kong tomorrow for the party of the year so I'm sure I'll either have some ridiculous or incoherent posts in the coming days - either way it should be hysterical!
Sunday, March 20, 2011
Hoedspruit
I'm now staying with one of my clients and his family in a small town Northeast of Johannesburg called Hoedspruit. He has three of the cutest kids ever (of course they can't compete with Sarah... or Chase) but they're beyond crazy, it's like they have a constant red bull drip.
This is a far cry from city life. He lives in a very nice gated community but there are giraffes, warthogs, and all kinds of antelope just walking around the community. He doesn't have a garbage disposal bc he just puts any waste or leftovers on a big tray outside and a couple of resident porcupines come to his house every night and eat the scraps. You can get close enough to pet these things, they're Huge, like the size of a large raccoon! Of course they've named the most regular porcupine Spike...
This is a far cry from city life. He lives in a very nice gated community but there are giraffes, warthogs, and all kinds of antelope just walking around the community. He doesn't have a garbage disposal bc he just puts any waste or leftovers on a big tray outside and a couple of resident porcupines come to his house every night and eat the scraps. You can get close enough to pet these things, they're Huge, like the size of a large raccoon! Of course they've named the most regular porcupine Spike...
Bringing Beer Pong to the Bush
First of all the bush is just the term for the area with the animals where you go on safari (I know some of you chuckled when you read the title of this post).
I was back at Savanna Lodge for the last three days. It was another incredible stay - great animal sightings, phenomenal food, and my group and the staff was so much fun. I'm beyond exhausted because I only got 11 hours of sleep over my 3 nights there...
We were up late boozing and telling jokes & stories pretty late every night. On the last night we decided to play some fun games, both drinking and real games. At about 11:30 I decided it was time to teach the South Africans how to play beer pong. We used bottle caps since there were no ping pong balls readily available and set up a table with six cups to a side. The Americans (me plus 3 from my group) played the first game to show how it is done, then we each paired with a South African staff member and had a mini 4 team tournament. By the end of the night we had the chef and bartenders playing. Needless to say that one of the rangers and I won the tournament and went to bed with a 7-0 record!
I was back at Savanna Lodge for the last three days. It was another incredible stay - great animal sightings, phenomenal food, and my group and the staff was so much fun. I'm beyond exhausted because I only got 11 hours of sleep over my 3 nights there...
We were up late boozing and telling jokes & stories pretty late every night. On the last night we decided to play some fun games, both drinking and real games. At about 11:30 I decided it was time to teach the South Africans how to play beer pong. We used bottle caps since there were no ping pong balls readily available and set up a table with six cups to a side. The Americans (me plus 3 from my group) played the first game to show how it is done, then we each paired with a South African staff member and had a mini 4 team tournament. By the end of the night we had the chef and bartenders playing. Needless to say that one of the rangers and I won the tournament and went to bed with a 7-0 record!
Good News
Wednesday March 16
We stayed at a guest house in Cape Town and the manager of the house (meaning bag guy, bartender, waiter, etc.) was a black guy named Goodnews. One of the guys in my group went out with friends right after we arrived so he hadn't met Goodnews.
The next morning Goodnews called us with wake up calls at 6:30am. When he called the guy he had not yet met the following conversation occurred:
Goodnews: Hi, this is Goodnews
Guy (half asleep and hungover): What's the good news?
Goodnews: This is your wake up call.
Guy: How the hell is that good news?
Goodnews: No, I am Goodnews
Guy: Whatever man, I'm up (hangs up)
He then showers and comes down to breakfast, at which point he meets our waiter- Goodnews. The look on his face was priceless as we watched him put together what had happened in his head...
We stayed at a guest house in Cape Town and the manager of the house (meaning bag guy, bartender, waiter, etc.) was a black guy named Goodnews. One of the guys in my group went out with friends right after we arrived so he hadn't met Goodnews.
The next morning Goodnews called us with wake up calls at 6:30am. When he called the guy he had not yet met the following conversation occurred:
Goodnews: Hi, this is Goodnews
Guy (half asleep and hungover): What's the good news?
Goodnews: This is your wake up call.
Guy: How the hell is that good news?
Goodnews: No, I am Goodnews
Guy: Whatever man, I'm up (hangs up)
He then showers and comes down to breakfast, at which point he meets our waiter- Goodnews. The look on his face was priceless as we watched him put together what had happened in his head...
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
On the Move...... Again
I spent the last 3 days at a beautiful lodge called Grootbos. We were incredibly busy and active while there, including shark cage diving with great whites, hiking through ancient caves and taking a scenic flight around the coast of South Africa (the plane was about 5 feet off the ground) - Awesome! The food at this place was incredible too, probably the best meals that I've ever had.
The highlight was last night. We stayed in the new Villa - it's a 6 bedroom ultra-modern mansion that looks out over the Atlantic. Besides the baller status of this place the owner had an informal brai (South African BBQ) for us and a bunch of staff. We grilled lobbies and steaks and drank from about 5pm til 1:30 in the morning. We were crushing bottles of wine and ripping shots. Everyone still there after midnight - about 8 of us - ended up in the pool; some in shorts, some fully clothed, and some ass naked. I also learned that in South Africa at anytime someone can mix up the nastiest shot possible and make someone else do it, they call it Straffdop - Afrikanse for penalty drink, and you better believe I'm bringing that back to the states. Usually this is done if you commit a 'party foul', however I was given two by one of the guides just bc I wasn't smiling. This was obviously very late and we were just passing them out for any reason, but my shot was Belvedere, Tanqueray & tomato juice - no idea how I kept it down...
Now I'm in Cape Town for the night, then tomorrow morning I head back to Savanna Lodge for 3 more days on safari. I'm really psyched to go back!
The highlight was last night. We stayed in the new Villa - it's a 6 bedroom ultra-modern mansion that looks out over the Atlantic. Besides the baller status of this place the owner had an informal brai (South African BBQ) for us and a bunch of staff. We grilled lobbies and steaks and drank from about 5pm til 1:30 in the morning. We were crushing bottles of wine and ripping shots. Everyone still there after midnight - about 8 of us - ended up in the pool; some in shorts, some fully clothed, and some ass naked. I also learned that in South Africa at anytime someone can mix up the nastiest shot possible and make someone else do it, they call it Straffdop - Afrikanse for penalty drink, and you better believe I'm bringing that back to the states. Usually this is done if you commit a 'party foul', however I was given two by one of the guides just bc I wasn't smiling. This was obviously very late and we were just passing them out for any reason, but my shot was Belvedere, Tanqueray & tomato juice - no idea how I kept it down...
Now I'm in Cape Town for the night, then tomorrow morning I head back to Savanna Lodge for 3 more days on safari. I'm really psyched to go back!
Saturday, March 12, 2011
Zimbabwe
I spent the last 4 days jetting around Zimbabwe with a few people in our own small plane. We got to see Victoria Falls, which is an unbelievable spectacle no matter how many times you've been, Hwange National Park (where the elephant visited me in the shower), and a beautiful lodge called Bumi Hills on Lake Kariba.
We took a booze cruise on the Zambezi River during which I watched a collar-popped douche bag from Australia get into a Springer style shouting match with his new wife. that was quite entertaining, however the highlight of the week was the following:
One of the people that was traveling with me was a total waste of oxygen, not only hideous but insanely dumb and dull - one of the worst people I've ever met (and mind you I've known Bhatt for years). The fact that this woman has a job is impressive, I'm shocked that she's made it through life as a human being for as long as she has.
Anyway, we went to a local Zimbabwean craft market on our last day and I watched this bitch trade her shoes for a small wooden bowl. The bowl couldn't have been worth more than five bucks, but she decided to walk around barefoot for the next 90 minutes until we got back to the hotel!
I've had a quick recharge in Johannesburg, including more steak, cubans & Jack, and now I'm off to meet another group in Cape Town.
We took a booze cruise on the Zambezi River during which I watched a collar-popped douche bag from Australia get into a Springer style shouting match with his new wife. that was quite entertaining, however the highlight of the week was the following:
One of the people that was traveling with me was a total waste of oxygen, not only hideous but insanely dumb and dull - one of the worst people I've ever met (and mind you I've known Bhatt for years). The fact that this woman has a job is impressive, I'm shocked that she's made it through life as a human being for as long as she has.
Anyway, we went to a local Zimbabwean craft market on our last day and I watched this bitch trade her shoes for a small wooden bowl. The bowl couldn't have been worth more than five bucks, but she decided to walk around barefoot for the next 90 minutes until we got back to the hotel!
I've had a quick recharge in Johannesburg, including more steak, cubans & Jack, and now I'm off to meet another group in Cape Town.
Friday, March 11, 2011
It's Been Awhile...
... Since I've been able to access internet, but I have been writing short posts over the past few days and they're pasted below.
Wine & Wildlife!
Monday March 7
What an incredible start to my trip - just spent the last two days at Savanna Lodge on the BEST safari of my life (yes that's a bold statement but there's not even a close second). You go on safari to see animals; and animals we saw. Lions, leopards, elephants, wild dogs, rhinos, cheetahs, buffalo, tons of antelope - and that was all on ONE game drive! The quality of some of these sightings was indescribable, including baby lion cubs, a lion eating an impala, a leopard catching a duiker (small antelope), and many other things that I'll never forget. I wish I could upload pictures and videos from my iPad, but I'll be sure to post some incredible shots as soon as I'm back in the states.
Besides the animals, there's the people, rooms and food. I couldn't have asked for better - food & rooms are five star, and all of the staff and other guests were incredibly fun and nice. And by the way, holy crap is South African wine amazing (although there might not be much of it left after the work my new Kiwi friend and I did at the bar, haha).
Now it's off to Zimbabwe for 4 nights, and although I won't be out on safari I'm very much looking forward to visiting this beautiful and once prosperous nation again!
Surprise Company
Thursday March 10
Following an awesome 2 hour bush walk (on which we saw giraffes, zebra, water buck, impala, etc.), I decided to take advantage of my sweet outdoor shower in my tent. While washing in the morning sun I heard some rustling in the leaves of the tree above me. I looked up only to find a huge gray trunk that happened to be attached to a fairly large female elephant. To say that I was shocked is an understatement... The elephant must have been about six feet away from me but I realized that she was just enjoying her breakfast so I finished my shower and went back in my room. An unbelievable, and certainly unforgettable, experience!
Only in Africa...
Mmmmmmmmm Bebop & Pumba
Thursday March 10
So I've had warthog for dinner two of the last three nights.
I know that doesn't sound good, but it was phenomenal!
Nothing too special but I thought some people might find it interesting (and/or gross).
Here's a photo from one of the restaurants where I had warthog, The Boma. they come around and do face-painting and you play the drums; it's good times!
Wine & Wildlife!
Monday March 7
What an incredible start to my trip - just spent the last two days at Savanna Lodge on the BEST safari of my life (yes that's a bold statement but there's not even a close second). You go on safari to see animals; and animals we saw. Lions, leopards, elephants, wild dogs, rhinos, cheetahs, buffalo, tons of antelope - and that was all on ONE game drive! The quality of some of these sightings was indescribable, including baby lion cubs, a lion eating an impala, a leopard catching a duiker (small antelope), and many other things that I'll never forget. I wish I could upload pictures and videos from my iPad, but I'll be sure to post some incredible shots as soon as I'm back in the states.
Besides the animals, there's the people, rooms and food. I couldn't have asked for better - food & rooms are five star, and all of the staff and other guests were incredibly fun and nice. And by the way, holy crap is South African wine amazing (although there might not be much of it left after the work my new Kiwi friend and I did at the bar, haha).
Now it's off to Zimbabwe for 4 nights, and although I won't be out on safari I'm very much looking forward to visiting this beautiful and once prosperous nation again!
Surprise Company
Thursday March 10
Following an awesome 2 hour bush walk (on which we saw giraffes, zebra, water buck, impala, etc.), I decided to take advantage of my sweet outdoor shower in my tent. While washing in the morning sun I heard some rustling in the leaves of the tree above me. I looked up only to find a huge gray trunk that happened to be attached to a fairly large female elephant. To say that I was shocked is an understatement... The elephant must have been about six feet away from me but I realized that she was just enjoying her breakfast so I finished my shower and went back in my room. An unbelievable, and certainly unforgettable, experience!
Only in Africa...
Mmmmmmmmm Bebop & Pumba
Thursday March 10
So I've had warthog for dinner two of the last three nights.
I know that doesn't sound good, but it was phenomenal!
Nothing too special but I thought some people might find it interesting (and/or gross).
Here's a photo from one of the restaurants where I had warthog, The Boma. they come around and do face-painting and you play the drums; it's good times!
Saturday, March 5, 2011
My New Haircut (Jagerbombs!)
If you don't know that reference (1) stop living under a rock, and (2) watch this clip, http://m.youtube.com/index?desktop_uri=%2F&gl=ZA#/watch?xl=xl_blazer&v=4JMOh-cul6M
Seriously though, I had to travel to Johannesburg to go to an Italian barber named Pino to get the best haircut of my life...
I walk in and he says "cappuccino or espresso?". No coffee was not an option, just one or the other. So by the time I'm half done with my cappuccino he says "wat u wan me to do?". I tried to explain a fade but we settled on "a 1 and a 2 with no line".
This guinea mother fucker proceeded to give me the best haircut I've ever gotten - cappuccino, followed by face massage by his assistant, then the buzzer, then a hot shave, then he faded it with scissors, followed by a head massage with hot towel, finally finished off with a glass of Italian white wine = $23!
After an afternoon like that DK don't just go back to his hotel room...
Ostrich steak cooked perfectly, amazing bottle of red wine, then 2 Cuban cigars and a bottle of Jack Single Barrel
At the moment life is Good!
Seriously though, I had to travel to Johannesburg to go to an Italian barber named Pino to get the best haircut of my life...
I walk in and he says "cappuccino or espresso?". No coffee was not an option, just one or the other. So by the time I'm half done with my cappuccino he says "wat u wan me to do?". I tried to explain a fade but we settled on "a 1 and a 2 with no line".
This guinea mother fucker proceeded to give me the best haircut I've ever gotten - cappuccino, followed by face massage by his assistant, then the buzzer, then a hot shave, then he faded it with scissors, followed by a head massage with hot towel, finally finished off with a glass of Italian white wine = $23!
After an afternoon like that DK don't just go back to his hotel room...
Ostrich steak cooked perfectly, amazing bottle of red wine, then 2 Cuban cigars and a bottle of Jack Single Barrel
At the moment life is Good!
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
PASSPORT REQUIRED!
I'm at JFK airport preparing to embark on one of the longest (and hopefully best) trips of my life. My current itinerary has me in South Africa for 5 nights, then Zimbabwe for 3 (with a quick stopover in Botswana for good measure), the next dozen evenings will be spent back in South Africa before flying to Hong Kong for the final 5 days of my tremendous journey. It feels like the only thing missing from such an extended adventure is a ring and a stop in Mordor...
Fortunately I will have several nights throughout the trip in major cities, which will allow me to keep you updated on my progress, not to mention have some laundry done... I'm working off of my iPad on this trip so pics and videos will have to wait until I'm back in NY in April, but check back regularly for stories/updates.
Fortunately I will have several nights throughout the trip in major cities, which will allow me to keep you updated on my progress, not to mention have some laundry done... I'm working off of my iPad on this trip so pics and videos will have to wait until I'm back in NY in April, but check back regularly for stories/updates.
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